It’s the first of the month! How the heck did that happen? It’s freakin’ December!
We’re changing up Hide Your Wallet slightly in the sense that we want to give you all a more curated list. There are more of us now and with all of us listing so many books, we felt the feature was getting a bit unwieldy and away from romance.
Going forward, we’ve giving ourselves individual caps and a certain number of books we mention have to be romance. We are a romance site after all! Hope you like the changes!
Queerbaiting and Fandom
Author: Joseph Brennan
Released: December 1, 2019 by University of Iowa Press
In this first-ever comprehensive examination of queerbaiting, fan studies scholar Joseph Brennan and his contributors examine cases that shed light on the sometimes exploitative industry practice of teasing homoerotic possibilities that, while hinted at, never materialize in the program narratives. Through a nuanced approach that accounts for both the history of queer representation and older fan traditions, these essayists examine the phenomenon of queerbaiting across popular TV, video games, children’s programs, and more.
Contributors: Evangeline Aguas, Christoffer Bagger, Bridget Blodgett, Cassie Brummitt, Leyre Carcas, Jessica Carniel, Jennifer Duggan, Monique Franklin, Divya Garg, Danielle S. Girard, Mary Ingram-Waters, Hannah McCann, Michael McDermott, E. J. Nielsen, Emma Nordin, Holly Eva Katherine Randell-Moon, Emily E. Roach, Anastasia Salter, Elisabeth Schneider, Kieran Sellars, Isabela Silva, Guillaume Sirois, Clare Southerton
Sneezy: Queerbaiting has been a thing for a long time, and we should already be long past it. Looking forward to learning more about the history of Queer representation in media and how Queer communities interacted with media!
Shadows & Dreams
Previously published; newly revised by author
I like my women like I like my whiskey: liable to kill me.
The two parts of being a paranormal private investigator I could really do without are being forced to eat bananas by an animated statue with a potassium fixation, and being put on trial for murder by a self-appointed council of vampire oligarchs.
To be fair, I did kind of do it (the murder, not the bananas). But I was kind of saving my girlfriend, who is kind of one of them.
On top of this, I’ve also wound up with a primordial queen of the damned trying to strangle me in my dreams. And the conspiracy of undead wizards who tried to sacrifice me fifteen years ago has decided that now is the best possible time to give it another go.
Throw in the woman who left me for a tech start-up, the old girlfriend who I might sort of owe eternal mystical fealty to and a werewolf “it girl” who can’t decide if she wants to eat me in the good way or the bad way, and I’m beginning to think life would be easier if I made better choices. Then again, it’d be a whole lot less fun.
Susan: Kate Kane is the half-fae disaster PI of my heart, so I’m really excited to see that there’s more books about her coming out!
A Madness of Sunshine
Author: Nalini Singh
Released: December 3, 2019 by Berkley
New York Times bestselling author Nalini Singh welcomes you to a remote town on the edge of the world where even the blinding brightness of the sun can’t mask the darkness that lies deep within a killer…
On the rugged West Coast of New Zealand, Golden Cove is more than just a town where people live. The adults are more than neighbors; the children, more than schoolmates.
That is until one fateful summer—and several vanished bodies—shatters the trust holding Golden Cove together. All that’s left are whispers behind closed doors, broken friendships, and a silent agreement not to look back. But they can’t run from the past forever.
Eight years later, a beautiful young woman disappears without a trace, and the residents of Golden Cove wonder if their home shelters something far more dangerous than an unforgiving landscape.
It’s not long before the dark past collides with the haunting present and deadly secrets come to light.
Elyse: The first thriller by Singh. I’m so excited!
Aarya: It has been well-documented that I am a Nalini Singh fangirl. Looking forward to burning the midnight oil on this one!
Beating About the Bush
Author: M. C. Beaton
Released: December 3, 2019 by Minotaur Books
Series: Agatha Raisin #30
New York Times bestseller M. C. Beaton’s cranky, crafty Agatha Raisin—now the star of a hit T.V. show—is back on the case again.
One of Private Detective Agatha Raisin’s many quirks was her tendency to exclaim, every time she drove along a motorway bordered by dense woodland, “What a good place to dump a body!” Yet she’s clearly not the only one to think so, the police realize, after poor elderly Mrs. Dunwiddy is found dead in the scrub by the road leading out of Mircester.
Agatha digs into the case, facing off with everyone from secretive factory bosses to Russian officials as she wades deeper into the mystery surrounding the killing. And as if things weren’t complicated enough, Agatha finds herself grappling with intensifying feelings for her friend and occasional lover, Sir Charles Fraith. Will Agatha get her man at last? Or will the killer get her first?
Lara: If you’ve watched the TV series, you’ve been denied the treat that is the real Agatha. Think Ms Trunchbull, but better dressed and actually rather nice.
Thursdays aren’t simply another day of the week for Amy Spencer and Ellis Hall. Thursday afternoons sizzle with no-strings sex for the two women, who meet each week in a hotel room to forget their past—and their present.
The arrangement works perfectly for Amy, a busy surgeon who’s still smarting from a failed relationship. For Ellis, Thursday afternoons act as a pressure valve from her cutthroat job and the mistakes in her personal life she’s trying to rectify.
But soon the pair discover that their outside worlds are on a collision course with the carefully constructed world they’ve created on Thursday afternoons. What will happen when they discover the truth about each other? Will their weekly assignations come to a screeching halt, or will they turn into something much, much more…
Tara: Two women have no-strings sex every Thursday afternoon. One of them is a surgeon and the other has what’s only described as a “cutthroat job”. I’m looking forward to the “Wait, YOU’RE the one I’ve been banging every week?” conversation and seeing what happens from there, because there’s clearly going to be some kind of blowup.
Would Like to Meet
In this charming, feel-good debut novel, a cynical assistant at a screenwriting agency must reenact the meet-cute scenes from classic romantic comedy movies in order to help her #1 client get his scriptwriting mojo back–but can a real-life meet-cute be in store for someone who doesn’t believe in happily ever after?
After seven years as an assistant, 29-year-old Evie Summers is ready to finally get the promotion she deserves. But now the TV and film agency she’s been running behind the scenes is in trouble, and Evie will lose her job unless she can convince the agency’s biggest and most arrogant client, Ezra Chester, to finish writing the script for a Hollywood romantic comedy.
The catch? Ezra is suffering from writer’s block–and he’ll only put pen to paper if singleton Evie can prove to him that you can fall in love like they do in the movies. With the future of the agency in jeopardy, Evie embarks on a mission to meet a man the way Sally met Harry or Hugh Grant met Julia Roberts.
But in the course of testing out the meet-cute scenes from classic romantic comedies IRL, not only will Evie encounter one humiliating situation after another, but she’ll have to confront the romantic past that soured her on love. In a novel as hilarious as it is heartwarming, debut author Rachel Winters proves that sometimes real life is better than the movies–and that the best kind of meet-cutes happen when you least expect them.
Lara: This is a trope-y bonanza and I’m here for it!
A Delicate Deception
When Amelia Allenby escaped a stifling London ballroom for the quiet solitude of the Derbyshire countryside, the very last thing she wanted was an extremely large, if—she grudgingly admits—passably attractive man disturbing her daily walks. Lecturing the surveyor about property rights doesn’t work and, somehow, he has soon charmed his way into lemon cakes, long walks, and dangerously heady kisses.
The very last place Sydney wished to be was in the shadow of the ruins of Pelham Hall, the inherited property that stole everything from him. But as he awaits his old friend, the Duke of Hereford, he finds himself increasingly captivated by the maddeningly lovely and exceptionally odd Amelia. He quickly finds that keeping his ownership of Pelham Hall a secret is as impossible as keeping himself from falling in love with her.
But when the Duke of Hereford arrives, Sydney’s ruse is revealed and what started out as a delicate deception has become a love too powerful to ignore. Will they let a lifetime of hurt come between them or can these two lost souls find love and peace in each other?
Shana: Honestly, the blurb makes the plot sound incomprehensible. BUT, I would read a douche advertisement if Cat Sebastian wrote it, and I feel strongly about vaginal flora. I will be reading this the day it’s released.
Ellen: This book is amazing. I laughed. I cried. I felt validated as a human being. I am so excited to review it and for everyone else to read it.
Susan: New Cat Sebastian! New Cat Sebastian! I am looking forward to all of the feelings this is going to give me already.
A Taste of Her Own Medicine
“He looks like he could plow my north field without a horse.”
Sonja Watts needs to re-enter the workforce after divorcing her husband of thirteen years. Taking the advice of her sister Birdie and her best friend Estelle, she signs up for a six-week course for entrepreneurs; hoping that she will learn everything she needs to know to build a business to support herself and her kids.
On the first night of class, Sonja is able to ignore the fact that most of the students were younger than her by ten years or more. It was what she expected. But when the instructor walks in, she debates packing up her new twelve hundred dollar laptop and walking out.
Sonja couldn’t remember the last time she looked at a man with little more interest than she give a sturdy dining room table. She was just disinterested.
But wow, did Atlas James grab her interest.
Atlas hasn’t been interested in dating since he moved back home from California. Adjusting to new found success in the town where everyone sees him as that big, geeky guy who cut grass for pocket change when they were in high school has been awkward. Aside from a couple of one night stands, he hasn’t really wanted to pursue a relationship with anyone until sweet, shy Sonja signs up for his class.
Compact, curvy, and juicy in all the right places, being in the same room Sonja Watts ignites all of those giddy feelings he felt when he had his first crush. He wants to know her and he’s pretty sure she wants to know him — despite the age difference that she seems to be so fixated on.
With her future riding on the success of her new business, Sonja has no time for distraction. Will she be able to keep her eyes on her own paper or will they remain glued to Atlas’s biceps and thick thighs?
Shana: The heroine is an herbalist who takes an entrepreneurship class and falls for her teacher, a younger man who “tends her lady garden” according to the ads. The cover is gorgeous, and I really want this to be good.
The Dead Girls Club
Author: Damien Angelica Walters
Released: December 10, 2019 by Crooked Lane Books
A supernatural thriller in the vein of A Head Full of Ghosts about two young girls, a scary story that becomes far too real, and the tragic–and terrifying–consequences that follow one of them into adulthood.
Red Lady, Red Lady, show us your face…
In 1991, Heather Cole and her friends were members of the Dead Girls Club. Obsessed with the macabre, the girls exchanged stories about serial killers and imaginary monsters, like the Red Lady, the spirit of a vengeful witch killed centuries before. Heather knew the stories were just that, until her best friend Becca began insisting the Red Lady was real–and she could prove it.
That belief got Becca killed.
It’s been nearly thirty years, but Heather has never told anyone what really happened that night–that Becca was right and the Red Lady was real. She’s done her best to put that fateful summer, Becca, and the Red Lady, behind her. Until a familiar necklace arrives in the mail, a necklace Heather hasn’t seen since the night Becca died.
The night Heather killed her.
Now, someone else knows what she did…and they’re determined to make Heather pay.
Elyse: This sounds like the perfect blend of horror and suspense.
fter a rocky start, Savannah Wells finally has everything she wants in life: family, friends, a cat, and her ice hockey team. If she could only convince her mother to stop setting her up on increasingly awkward blind dates, life would be perfect.
Professional photographer Madison Scott isn’t going to settle for less than the happily ever after she reads about in romance novels. But her new next-door neighbor is sexy as hell, so when Savannah suggests a fake relationship in hopes of getting her mother to stop interfering in her private life, Maddie’s all in.
When fake dating, fake kissing, and forced proximity start to feel a lot like falling in love, Savannah and Madison will need to face off and decide if exchanging pretend for reality is really possible.
Tara: F/f fake relationship with a next door neighbour and one of them is a hockey player. I’m totally in.
Breaking up is hard to do, but three weeks before Christmas it’s even more painful. Jessica Raymond isn’t in love with her ex-girlfriend anymore; she just hates to emotionally limp through the holidays. When a cute gray kitten shows up on her doorstep, Jessica panics. She doesn’t have time for a pet. Finding sexy Veterinarian Dr. Taylor Mitchell intriguing isn’t part of the plan either, but both manage to turn her world upside down.
Taylor Mitchell isn’t going to let a beautiful woman with a bad attitude bring her down. It’s the holidays and she’s determined to show some much-needed Christmas spirit and help a lonely cat find a good home.
A few kitten-induced mishaps bring them closer and sharing the same space suddenly isn’t so bad. Chatting is actually pretty nice. Did this sweet kitten show up to help them find each other? Or is the holiday spirit to blame for their special connection?
Tara: This Christmas novella is cute as hell. It has a grumpy first person narrator who can’t help falling for a veterinarian, thanks to a (probably, at least a little bit, magical) cat with the best cat name ever.
Rayne Marcellus knows what people want, and she’s damn good at getting it. Antiquities is her game, and she’s the best there is, moving in the shadows even as she trades in the light. When an ambitious businessman approaches her to take on a deadlier game than even she’s willing to play, she knows she has to stop him. But she’ll need help…
After a previous betrayal, Chase Stinsen doesn’t want anything to do with Rayne. Chase believes archeology is a tool to understand the past in an effort to help the future and has no use for profiting from the finds of history. But when Rayne proposes they track the legendary Golden Trinity, with the added benefit of helping indigenous tribes, she’s hooked.
Danger lurks around every corner, and their defenses crumble as they have to depend on one another to survive. If Chase can finally trust Rayne again, she might just end up with more than the gold.
Susan: My excitement for Uncharted (the book) mainly comes from that blurb reading like someone’s f/f Uncharted (the game) fic with the serial numbers filed off. I am VERY here for that, especially if it’s got fewer colonialist underpinnings!
The Kill Club
Author: Wendy Heard
Released: December 17, 2019 by MIRA
Jazz will stop at nothing to save her brother.
Their foster mother, Carol, has always been fanatical, but with Jazz grown up and out of the house, Carol takes a dangerous turn that threatens thirteen-year-old Joaquin’s life. Over and over, child services fails to intervene, and Joaquin is running out of time.
Then Jazz gets a blocked call from someone offering a solution. There are others like her—people the law has failed. They’ve formed an underground network of “helpers,” each agreeing to eliminate the abuser of another. They’re taking back their power and leaving a trail of bodies throughout Los Angeles—dubbed the Blackbird Killings. If Jazz joins them, they’ll take care of Carol for good.
All she has to do is kill a stranger.
Amanda: This sounds all sorts of fucked up!
Mangos and Mistletoe
Kiskeya Burgos left the tropical beaches of the Dominican Republic with a lot to prove. As a pastry chef on the come up, when she arrives in Scotland, she has one goal in mind: win the Holiday Baking Challenge. Winning is her opportunity to prove to her family, her former boss, and most importantly herself, she can make it in the culinary world. Kiskeya will stop at nothing to win , that is, if she can keep her eyes on the prize and off her infuriating teammate’s perfect lips.
Sully Morales, home cooking hustler, and self-proclaimed baking brujita lands in Scotland on a quest to find her purpose after spending years as her family’s caregiver. But now, with her home life back on track, it’s time for Sully to get reacquainted with her greatest love, baking. Winning the Holiday Baking Challenge is a no brainer if she can convince her grumpy AF baking partner that they make a great team both in and out of the kitchen before an unexpected betrayal ends their chance to attain culinary competition glory.
Aarya: Let’s see: f/f enemies-to-lovers in Scottish holiday baking competition with GBBO vibes. Hello, catnip. And just in time for Christmas!
Grand Theft N.Y.E.
Cleo Wright is just a happy scammer on a mission to rob a rich man before his ex-wife or the federal government seize all of his money and possessions. She’s not expecting to meet another rich man who makes her want to use her nimble fingers for other, not thieving, things. But Robert Shimizu is just that man.
The two share a night of fast cars, expensive champagne and the best sex of her life. But Cleo is who she is and when Robert wakes up the next morning, she’s long gone… with his car and a few other very expensive possessions.
It takes him months to track down the woman who stole his favorite watch and his heart, but when he does, there’s fireworks.
Aarya: I’ve read so many Christmas romances this year but there are hardly any about New Year’s Eve. And this one has a robbery!
Sometimes love is unpredictable…
Twenty-nine-year-old Charlotte Rosen has a secret: she’s a widow. Ever since the fateful day that leveled her world, Charlotte has worked hard to move forward. Great job at a hot social media analytics company? Check. Roommate with no knowledge of her past? Check. Adorable dog? Check. All the while, she’s faithfully data-crunched her way through life, calculating the probability of risk—so she can avoid it.
Yet Charlotte’s algorithms could never have predicted that her late husband’s ashes would land squarely on her doorstep five years later. Stunned but determined, Charlotte sets out to find meaning in this sudden twist of fate, even if that includes facing her perfectly coiffed, and perfectly difficult, ex-mother-in-law—and her husband’s best friend, who seems to become a fixture at her side whether she likes it or not.
But soon a shocking secret surfaces, forcing Charlotte to answer questions she never knew to ask and to consider the possibility of forgiveness. And when a chance at new love arises, she’ll have to decide once and for all whether to follow the numbers or trust her heart.
Sneezy: I’m enough of a schmuck that I sometimes steer clear of a book just because I know parts of it are sad, but more and more I’m starting to appreciate how lovely stories about resilience, healing, and love after heartbreak can be.
The Prince of Broadway
In the second novel in Joanna Shupe’s the Uptown Girl series, a ruthless casino owner bent on revenge finds his plans upended by a beautiful women who proves to be more determined than he is—and too irresistible to deny.
Powerful casino owner.
Destroyer of men.
He lives in the shadows…
As the owner of the city’s most exclusive casino, Clayton Madden holds the fortunes of prominent families in the palms of his hands every night. There is one particular family he burns to ruin, however, one that has escaped his grasp… until now.
She is society’s darling…
Florence Greene is no one’s fool. She knows Clayton Madden is using her to ruin her prestigious family… and she’s using him right back. She plans to learn all she can from the mysterious casino owner—then open a casino of her own just for women.
With revenge on his mind, Clay agrees to mentor Florence. However, she soon proves more adept—and more alluring—than Clay bargained for. When his plans are threatened, Clay must decide if he is willing to gamble his empire on love.
Amanda: I liked the first book in this series and I’m very interested in the heroine’s plans for a casino!
Sweet Talkin’ Lover
Tracey Livesay delivers the first novel in her sexy new series about lifelong friends and unforgettable love stories.
When everything is on the line,
surrendering completely to love is your only choice…
Marketing manager Caila Harris knows that the road to success in the beauty industry doesn’t allow for detours. She’s forsaken any trace of a social life, working 24/7 to ensure her next promotion. When grief over her grandfather’s death leads to several catastrophic decisions, Caila gets one final chance to prove herself: shut down an unprofitable factory in a small Southern town. But as soon as she arrives in Bradleton, she meets one outsized problem: the town’s gorgeous mayor.
Wyatt Bradley isn’t thrilled about his nickname, Mayor McHottie. He’s even less happy to learn that his town might be losing its biggest employer. If he has to, he’ll use some sneaky tactics to get Caila on his side. Yet even as he’s hoping she’ll fall for Bradleton, he’s falling too—right into a combustible affair that shakes them both with its intensity.
Two stubborn people, torn between loyalty, ambition, and attraction. But when you’re willing to give it your all, there’s no limit to how far love can take you…
Aarya: I didn’t think I was in the mood for politician protagonists, but I’m finding the idea of “Mayor McHottie” irresistible.
Forever My Duke
“I find Miss Fanshawe to be quite charming—for an American.”—The Prince Regent
Hadrian Ames, the Duke of Clayton, needs a bride. He even has the perfect one picked out. That is, until he meets the lovely, free-spirited Natalie Fanshawe. She’s the opposite of what a man of his high rank should desire in a wife—an outspoken American who has never even set foot in a London ballroom.
But Natalie doesn’t have time to be swept off her feet by a handsome duke who must be a spoiled scoundrel like every other British lord. And she couldn’t care less about Hadrian’s title. After all, it’s not as if he actually worked to attain his wealth and status. He surely can’t understand what it’s like to be a busy woman, planning to open a school while trying to reunite a six-year-old orphan with his English relatives. Nevertheless, Hadrian launches his campaign to win her heart. Can the utterly delightful American beauty ever find a way to love him…despite his being a duke?
Amanda: Okay, first, the hero says the heroine is charming, “for an American.” And then the heroine rankles that the hero has never had to work for his status. This description is a snarkfest and I love it.
In this warm and witty romance from acclaimed author Kate Clayborn, one little word puts a woman’s business—and her heart—in jeopardy . . .
Meg Mackworth’s hand-lettering skill has made her famous as the Planner of Park Slope, designing custom journals for her New York City clientele. She has another skill too: reading signs that other people miss. Knowing the upcoming marriage of Reid Sutherland and his polished fiancée was doomed to fail is one thing, but weaving a secret word of warning into their wedding program is another. Meg may have thought no one would spot it, but she hadn’t counted on sharp-eyed, pattern-obsessed Reid.
A year later, Reid has tracked Meg down to find out how she knew that his meticulously planned future was about to implode. But with a looming deadline and a bad case of creative block, Meg doesn’t have time for Reid’s questions—unless he can help her find her missing inspiration. As they gradually open up to each other, both try to ignore a deepening connection between them. But the signs are there—irresistible, indisputable, urging Meg to heed the messages Reid is sending her, before it’s too late . . .
Sarah: A calligrapher with a massive online following hides a code in some of her work, and an almost-groom and former client tracks her down to ask how she knew his marriage was doomed- and then they keep talking. I have heard from several people, including recent podcast guests like Andie J. Christopher, that this book is charming and wonderful and I’m really looking forward to it.
Sneezy: There are fonts. A pinch of magic, or as Alchemists would call it, signs from the universe. A wild romp to get back on track of their personal legends – oh baby, come to mama.
Catherine: This sounds like so much fun. Calligraphy, magic, logic puzzles… I have the ARC in my hot little hands and it’s next on my TBR list.
Susan: I love looking at people’s planners, so as soon as I saw that the protagonist designs and letters journals for people I was ALL IN.
My Darling Duke
Miss Katherine Danvers has always been a wallflower. But now, with her family on the brink of financial ruin, she finds herself a desperate wallflower. To save her family, she’ll do anything. Luckily, she has the perfect plan…
She’ll impress the ton by simply announcing she is engaged to the reclusive and mysterious Duke of Thornton, Alexander Masters, and secure strong matches for her sisters. No one has heard from the duke in years. Surely he’ll never find out before her sisters’ weddings, and she can go back to her own quiet life.
Soon, though, everything is out of control. At first, it’s just a few new ball gowns on the duke’s accounts. Then, it’s interviews with reporters eager for gossip. Before she knows it, Katherine has transformed herself into Kitty Danvers, charming and clever belle of the ton—with everyone eager to meet her thankfully absent fiancé.
But when the enigmatic Alexander Masters suddenly arrives in the city, dashing and oh so angry, he demands retribution. Except not in the way Katherine expected…
Ellen: I am very much into the energy of someone just announcing that they are engaged to a recluse they have never met for the clout.
The One for You
The highly-anticipated fourth book in Roni Loren’s unforgettable The Ones Who Got Away series.
She got a second chance at life.
Will she take a second chance at love?
Kincaid Breslin wasn’t supposed to survive that fateful night at Long Acre when so many died, including her boyfriend—but survive she did. She doesn’t know why she got that chance, but now she takes life by the horns and doesn’t let anybody stand in her way
Ashton Isaacs was her best friend when disaster struck all those years ago, but he chose to run as far away as he could. Now fate has brought him back to town, and Ash doesn’t know how to cope with his feelings for Kincaid and his grief over their lost friendship. For Ash has been carrying secrets, and he knows that once Kincaid learns the truth, he’ll lose any chance he might have had with the only woman he’s ever loved.
Amanda: This series…THIS SERIES! It’s one of my favorites of all time and while I’m so sad to see it end, I’m excited for whatever Loren writes next.
Author: Deborah Teramis Christian
Released: December 31, 2019 by Tor Books
Genre: Science Fiction/Fantasy
Deborah Teramis Christian is back with a rousing stand-alone sequel to fan favorite Mainline…
One of the many charms of planet Lyndir is the Between-World, home to the licensed entertainers of the Sa’adani empire. The most famous is Kes, a professional dominatrix who has become a celebrity attraction at a palatial dungeon called Tryst.
One of Kes’s most devoted clients is the infamous interplanetary political operative Janus, the last man standing when his business fell apart on Selmun III, and now a major cog in Lyndir’s political machine. When a high-powered imperial authority decides she wants Janus out of the way, the seductive domna Kes is the most logical avenue. She’d never betray a client’s trust, but the threat to her and her Sa’adani sisters is so great that she has no choice but to assist.
Imprisoned, altered against her will, and turned into a brutal weapon by the highly experimental Splintegrate cloning technology, Kes is at war with herself as everything she holds dear falls apart around her. It will take an enormous triumph of will and help from some unlikely avenues for Kes to survive the government’s machinations and pursue the independence she’s craved her entire life.
Ellen: Ummmmmm science fiction with a professional dominatrix heroine locked up in a government conspiracy? HELL. YES.